When she told me what happened and how and why she decided to take the pill, the conversation got all kinds of wheels and cogs turning in my head. I imagined her as Neo in the Matrix and having to choose between the red or blue pill. A bit of a stretch here but, in some sense, the morning after pill seems to be the red and blue pill all in one. Even before taking it, you have to ask ultimately, what illusions and realities are worth pursuing.? Now I'll leave you, dear audience, to debate the moral implications of the morning-after pill. Perhaps such a debate will serve as fodder for this Sunday's brunch (dear lord, how I love to pretend that my blog warrants such attention or buzz!). However, my interest with the subject does not spring from any moral angle. Rather, it got me thinking about choices and plans, and the notion of a Plan B in Life.Sometimes we make choices and decisions in haste or we exercise poor judgement. How many times have we mucked up in life, wishing we could rewind time and undo unsound actions? I'm not only talking about nights of debauchery and wantonness, but Life choices, you know, the big stuff. Maybe it was taking the wrong job, buying the wrong house, marrying the wrong person, or making a poor investment, whether that be in the wrong thing, person, or situation. What if we had a lil pill we could pop which would BLOOP! magically negate not exercising more common sense and we could, in a sense, start afresh? The Plan B pill is almost a time travel of sorts. You digest it and, although you can't change certain courses of action, you can change the repercussions of these actions.
This further lead me take a look at my own actions and decisions in life, and more so, any regrets. And the realization I stumbled upon both surprised and pleased me.
Don't get me wrong, there are poor decisions I've made, like questionable choices in hair styles (I went through this phase where I was super feisty and wanted to, literally, look like fire. Looking back, I wish some of my friends would have tried and put out that fire. Red and orange hair on a brown girl is not cute. Not on THIS brown girl anyway), shady romantic entanglements (in my last post I mentioned I'm the douche bag whisperer. Might I add I'm also the married man whisperer. Hmm. Are the two one in the same?) and poor choices in who I surround myself with ( Hi, you know who you are, kindly return the money you stole from me, woman. Thanks!)
However, with the big things I can't say I regret much, even the times that I've been earth shatteringly screwed over or profoundly hurt. I wouldn't take it back for the world because that's me, I live and love my way, even when I'm told somethings amiss. I have to live things through and come to conclusions by my own experience, though at times I hear in harmony the I told-you-so's from family and friends.
I'm hard-headed and perhaps too soft-hearted but I tell you, my gut, Goldilocks style, is JUST RIGHT. I've finally gotten a bit better at knowing which instincts to follow. And so I pursue things to the point where there's no return. In doing so, I've never thought what could have been because I experience what actually IS, the good, the bad, and the flat-out fugly. And all the plans that didn't come to fruition, well, I can't begin to catalogue those for you. Does it mean I no longer plan? Hell no. It just means that even without a little pill, I've rolled with certain punches. I think in the grand scheme of things in LIFE I am on, say, plan H with all the alternates I've had to create when things with family, health, career and love didn't pan out like I once thought it would. Whats that saying? Something like life is what happens when you're busy making other plans? Yeah, no joke.
So I guess this post is a bit of a love note to myself. Self, you're not as bad off as ya think! The no regrets realization has me thinking that maybe, just maybe, dare I say, I'm doing something right*? Oh how the mind delightfully boggles at such a realization!
What about you? If you could pop a pill and change certian outcomes, what would YOU change?
While you mull that one over, I'm gonna share a recipe with you that I have for Anda tharkari (egg curry). We'll loop this back to how we started: pregnancy. Ladies, sometimes ya want your eggs fertilized. Sometimes you don't. Me? My mind may change in the future, but for now, I only want my eggs boiled and in a tharkari, thank you very much. Be smart. Be safe. Live the spicy life, Loves!
I DON'T WANT MY EGGS FERTILIZED ANDA THARKARI
serves 4
Ingredients
8 large soft boiled eggs
4 tablespoons vegetable oil
one small onion, diced small
1/2 teaspoon ground turmeric
1/2 tablespoon freshly minced garlic
1/2 tablespoon freshly minced ginger
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1/2 teaspoon ground coriander
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1 small tomato, diced small
1 teaspoon garam masala
2 cups tap water
1 tablespoon tomato puree
2 tablespoons chopped cilantro leaves
1/2 teaspoon ghee (clarified butter)
HOW TO THROW DOWN
- Heat 2 tablespoons oil over high heat in a heavy bottom pot.
- Add boiled eggs and saute gently, taking care not to break them. Saute for 4 minutes. Remove eggs from pot.
- Add remaining 2 tablespoons oil to pot. Add onions and fry until transluscent or for 3 to 4 minutes
- Reduce heat to medium. Add turmeric, garlic, ginger, cumin, coriander, and salt. Cook with onions for 2 minutes.
- Add tomato. Cook for 3 minutes.
- Add garam masala and continue to cook for 2 minutes. In the meantime, cut reserved eggs vertically. Add to pot and cook for 3 to 4 minutes.
- Add water and tomato puree and increase heat to high. Cook for 6 to 7 minutes.
- Turn off heat. Add cilantro and swirl in ghee. Remove from heat and transfer to serving dish.
DISCLAIMER: *This does not preclude me from writing about regrets in the future. But for now, I'm OK with taking ownership for all life decisions, shady or otherwise.
You are hilarious!!
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